Forking Good!

Fork Food Market Logo

I love food markets and I think they love me back in their own special way. There was that one time in Tepoztlan, State of Morelos, Mexico. The Tepozteco loomed at a distance and I sat on a rickety wooden bench before an indigenous woman who seared corn tortillas on a comal and stuffed them with fresh cheese, zucchini blossoms and huitlacoche, a fungus known as corn smut and a delicacy south of the Rio Grande. Even though the skies opened up and a plastic tarp served as a makeshift awning, little could deter us from enjoying our earthy homemade quesadillas amidst our humid and humble surroundings. A week later, though, the market showered me with all kinds of love: a furious gastrointestinal ailment, the feverish consumption of toilet paper and a self-imposed saltine-crackers-and-serum diet that lasted for what seemed like years.

Early On

Here on The Rock, weekly food markets are non-existent so many of us rejoiced when Fork Food Market set up shop in Aglantzia every Friday from 6 p.m. to late throughout the month of July. With an itinerant location, the market aimed to provide revellers with international street food (no souvlakia here, people) including burritos, pulled-pork sandwiches, Jamaican jerk chicken, cheeseburgers, Taiwanese steamed buns (gua bao), churros, lasagna, vegetarian fare and more.

Gua Bao & Pulled Pork

On our visit last Friday, we sampled a gamut of dishes, voting the burgers and Taiwanese steamed buns as the best-in-show. The burger (my guess is a quarter pounder) was cooked a perfect medium (some might argue medium-rare) and came dressed with bacon, sautéed onions, cheese, lettuce, tomatoes and pickles on a soft bun topped with loads of sesame seeds. For a street burger, it was worth the six Euros and tops, say, Goodburger on Larnakos Avenue. The steamed buns, soft and airy, were filled with either teriyaki-glazed pork belly or salmon, some lettuce and a sliver of cucumber. The pork version was tender and not too cloying, albeit served a bit too lukewarm for my palate.

Churros With Caramel Sauce

Other dishes, while still commendable, were not as successful. The pulled-pork sandwich was not the traditional version we expected. In our world, it's slow-roasted hand-pulled pork doused with a runny Carolina-style barbecue sauce and a creamy coleslaw. The Urban Soul Kitchen's version felt more like a Sloppy Joe: the meat was very finely pulled and seemed to have been cooked in a thick and quite spicy (thumbs up!) barbecue sauce. Also, the bun was too big for the amount of meat included and felt a tad stale. Dessert-wise, Kalopessas' churros were light and flavourful, courtesy of a rich caramel sauce, but lacked the soft crunch I associate with biting into this Spanish dessert. My guess is our portion had been sitting out for a while and wilted like a flower in the Nicosia heat. Furthermore, the beer and wine selection (KEO and Heineken on draft and small bottles of Greek Moschofilero) was somewhat of a letdown. Fork Food Market would have been an ideal place where to showcase Cypriot wines and/or invite Prime Microbrewery or Aphrodite's Rock Brewing Company to supply the beer.

The Masses

Overall, the event was jovial and kid-friendly and brought out the masses by eight-thirty p.m. or so. According to our drunken headcount, at some point there must have been at least 1,500 people crowding Spyros Kyprianou Municipal Park in search of quality street food. There is one issue, though, that deserves to be addressed vis-a-vis the ambiance. A radio station blared music from several speakers and every so often a pair of emcees grabbed the microphones to narrate what was going on around them. Stop that. It's not necessary or enjoyable. We don't need people giving us a play-by-play of what's on offer, specially if it's loud and not comedic. If all this hullabaloo is for your radio listeners, then a simple and succinct message promoting the market every thirty minutes is more than enough. I know brevity is not part of the Greek DNA but many of us don't want a side of yapper with our food.

Fork Food Market's Season Finale will be tomorrow (July 25th) from 6 p.m. to late at Skali Aglantzias. See you there, acoustic earmuffs not included.

Whine On The Rocks' Rating: 4 out of 5 Sparkling Spatulas

A New Day for Cyprus Wine?

As part of the financial haircut imposed on The Rock by Troika, the Cypriot government abolished the Cyprus Wine Products Council, thereby marking an end to the island's annual wine competition. I always looked forward to this event, maybe because it gave me an excuse to taste wines and write about them, maybe because deep down I longed for an invite to the shindig as a guest comedian blogger. Albeit, that invitation was never mailed, and I can only imagine what went down while everyone got it on with Mademoiselle Maratheftiko et al.

Fortunately enough, a week ago (June 4th to the 7th) the Municipality of Limassol took on the responsibility and hosted a new rendition of the Cyprus Wine Competition at the Panos Solomonides Cultural Center. The event was open to the public and awarded Grand Gold, Gold and Silver medals to dozens of Cypriot wines. Unable to attend given the longish drive and Little Miss Despot's need for Papa, I scoured the web in search of the results. A few wineries posted their awarded wines on Facebook but nowhere could I find an event website listing its procedures, participants, winners, etc. In this day and age, it makes very little sense to have a negligible online presence so I hope that by next year a website is up and running. Heck, if the powers that be need a blogger/writer to set it up, I'm all yours. However, if my rudimentary research skills failed me and there is in fact some sort of web presence for the competition, feel free to pelt me with ripe grapes and guide me in the right direction.

In any case, my blogging/Twitter friends at Evoinos Cyprus Wine (whom I assume were in attendance) posted and shared the results with me. Here's a snazzy table listing the victors.

Grand Gold	Gold	Silver
Kyperounda Chardonnay 2013	Etko St. Nicholas Commandaria 2009	K&K Vasilikon Winery Methi 2009
Loel Alasia Commandaria 2007	Ayia Mavri Mosxatos 2012	Keo Cabernet Sauvignon/Blanc Rosé 2013
	Keo St. John Commandaria	Vouni Panayia Barba Yiannis 2012
	Vlassides Cabernet Sauvignon 2011	Makkas Syrah 2011
	Ayia Mavri Mosxatos 2011	Vlassides Shiraz 2012
	Kyperounda Shiraz 2012	Kyperounda Petritis Xynisteri 2013
	Dafermou White 2013	Erimoudes Athina 2013
	Kyperounda Epos Red 2011	Yiaskouris White 2013
	Makkas Chardonnay 2013	Constantinou Cabernet Sauvignon 2010
	Constantinou Shiraz 2011	Tsiakkas Cabernet Sauvignon 2009
	Makkas Maratheftiko 2011	Kyperounda Rosé 2013
	Keo Xynisteri 2013	K&K Vasilikon Winery Vasilikon 2013
		Kyperounda Epos White 2013
		Vlassides White 2013
		Constantinou Ayioklima Xynisteri 2013
		Tsiakkas Xynisteri 2013

Let's just say I'm really looking forward to trying the 2013 Kyperounda Winery Chardonnay. Happy drinking, people, and #VamosEcuador #SiSePuede #LittleMissDespotLovesAV25.

Introducing "Los Heffes"

The Full Pint

I know nothing about the home-brewing of beer but here's how I imagine it. A garage, balcony or storage room with sufficient ventilation but creepy enough lighting is converted into a makeshift laboratory. Crusty pots, dirty buckets, glass bottles and sacks of grains and hops are scattered around, a collection of toys for big boys. Over a gas burner, a large pot full of yellowish liquid rumbles, its bitter fumes dispersing like thinning fog. A mad scientist, preferably in flip-flops, boxer shorts, a cruddy ripped tank top and snorkelling goggles, stirs the potion with a kayak paddle or cricket bat or lamb femur and cackles. His hair is unruly and his eyes are bloodshot. Sweat dribbles down his armpits while he waits with patience for his Frankensteiner [insert your preferred style of beer] to be ready. From inside the house, a woman's high-pitched squealing drags him out of his reverie. "No, honey, I cannot help you trim your cuticles and paint your toenails," he says, sighing and taking a long swig from a bottle of Hopsonouris IPA, one of last year's home brewing successes.

"Los Heffes" en acción!

This past weekend, I meant to ask the four gentlemen (who I've baptised "Los Heffes" after one of their beers) behind the Cyprus Homebrewers Association whether my somewhat vivid imagination matches their daily brewing reality. On Saturday, May 31st, for the first time ever on The Rock, they hosted "The Full Pint," a home brewing festival held behind Faneromeni Church in which they showcased nineteen of their beers. Hundreds of people showed up throughout the day, many stopping by as a thirst-quenching preamble to the hugely successful 1st Cyprus Pride Parade that took off from Eleftheria Square at five p.m. on its way to Parliament.

During my forty-five minute stint at the festival, I tasted six beers, several of them better than many of the locally produced beers available in supermarkets. The DUA 101 Dusseldorf Alt was a fuller bodied and more flavourful summer alternative to a lager, while the WIT 10 Orange Belgian Wit, a beer approved by The Wife, Ph.D., had a lively citrus kick and plenty of tanginess. The Tutti Frutti Raspberry Wheat, seemingly a crowd favourite, did not appeal to me as much as I expected a greater concentration of fruit and spice. The Wife, Ph.D., who tends to specialise in fruity beers, agreed with me. The Mystic Roots Pale Ale was a faithful rendition of the style with plenty of hops, which, according to its humble brewer Costas Siahinian of Brewfellas fame, help hide its shortcomings. Likewise, the AAA 5 American Amber Ale was a balanced effort that, in my opinion, packed a greater wallop than Prime Microbrewery's version. Personally, my favourite beer was the BAA 40 Belgian Amber Ale concocted by Costas Panayiotides. This medium-bodied brew elicited lovely aromas of caramelised bananas and sweet spice and a balanced, mouth-puckering taste. I took a full pint with me to enjoy as I walked with the crowds towards the Pride Parade.

First Cyprus Pride Parade

It is wonderful to see progress, in all realms of life, being made on The Rock. Beers (#NotCarlsberg) are improving thanks to people like "Los Heffes" and the local microbreweries. Wines are becoming more refined and lauded in competitions. Most important, though, equality for all as praxis is fermenting as demonstrated by the four thousand five hundred people who marched in support of LGBT rights on the island.

Cyprus: Keep on trucking. Just don't spill your beer.

The Year of Xyn?

A Thursday quick hitter. A couple weeks back, several Cypriot wines were awarded Gold and Silver medals during the 14th Thessaloniki Wine Competition. A brief glance at the results shows quite the success for the Cypriot variety Xynisteri in 2013: four Gold and three Silver out of a total sixteen medals collected by The Rock's wineries. Am I reading too much into this or was 2013 a good year for the grape?

Gold Medals

2010 Vlassides Winery Private Selection (Red Blend)

2005 Sodap Saint Barnabas Commandaria

2013 Sodap Stroumpeli Chardonnay

2011 Ayia Mavri Winery Mosxatos

2013 Sodap Kamantarena Xynisteri

2013 Zambartas Wineries Xynisteri

2013 Vlassides Winery White (Xynisteri/Sauvignon Blanc)

2013 Ktima Gerolemo Xynisteri Dry

Silver Medals

2012 Zambartas Wineries Epicourios (Lefkada/Merlot)

2009 Vassilikon Winery Methi (Cabernet Sauvignon)

2013 Vassilikon Winery White (Xynisteri)

2012 Ktima Gerolemo Maratheftiko

2008 Vardalis Winery Maratheftiko

2013 Kolios Winery Persefoni (Xynisteri)

2012 Zambartas Wineries Maratheftiko

2013 Ktima Gerolemo Xynisteri Medium/Sweet

On a related (island wine) note, Grand Gold Medals were handed out to the 2004 Domaine Sigalas P.D.O. Santorini Vin Santo and 2010 U.V.C. Samos P.D.O. Samos Nectar. Nothing like a duo of stickies to sweeten up our lives.

#HugYourMechanic

"To Koultouriariko" Tavern, Gourri

Mechanics sure know their meze. Long and dirty days loosening bolts, changing burnt oil, swapping air filters and suspiciously eyeing malfunctioning carburators must open their appetites. I picture a handful of them after work, grime under their fingernails and their overalls smelling of exhaust gas, hunched like giants over a table crowded with enough food to feed a pod of walruses and reenergise them for a new day at work. It hardly surprised me then when My Alternate Personal Skipper (MAPS) told me that a mechanic he works with introduced him to "To Koultouriariko," an inconspicuous tavern on a tight bend in the village of Gourri. On a side note, Gourri takes the prize for "Most Unpleasant Village *Name* on The Rock," one that, in The Wife, Ph.D.'s sophisticated opinion, recalls swine and slime.

The tavern occupies a small traditional corner house with a medium-sized veranda for outdoor seating. The decor is sparse, and the patrons are packed tightly into two rooms, leaving little space but in your belly for the copious amounts of food that's rushed to the table. So there we sat, myself, Little Miss Despot, The Wife, Ph.D., Double Trouble, The Brother-in-Law, Radio Free Cyprus and Cousin #2, hostages to MAPS and Cousin #6's invitation to be handsomely fed.

Towards The End

Please bare with me as I walk you through our meze that Sunday afternoon. [WARNING: Long list in the making.] A traditional and very fresh village salad, feta and all. Green crushed (not crashed, people) olives with coriander and lemon. Tahini dip. Thick village yoghurt. Pickled green chilli peppers and actual pickles. Slices of white bread, both untouched and toasted with olive oil and herbs. Wine-soaked sausages, not as good as Katidata's but still rather tasty. Grilled halloumi, duh. The house specialty and main reason behind our visit, a pastitsio served in a medium-sized terracotta ramekin, piping hot and creamy and nuanced and the best I've had, exclamation point. Runny scrambled eggs with fresh tomatoes. Lemony stuffed vine leaves. More scrambled eggs, this time with spinach. Snails tossed in a sweet and cinnamon-infused tomato sauce. Wine-soaked bacon. Crunchy pork souvlakia. Pitta bread. Tender, juicy, herb-packed sheftalies, again (there's an ongoing theme here) the best I've had in years. Lamb (not lamp, people) chops. Lamb liver and sweetbreads. Bulgur wheat and keftedes, these (their only misstep) too packed, dry and cold for my taste. Moist chicken souvlakia marinated (according to Radio Free Cyprus) with onions, garlic, paprika and yoghurt. Hand cut potato chips sprinkled with oregano. Lamb souvla that fell off the bone, an extra dish custom-ordered by MAPS because, hey, we all need our veggies. A sweet ricotta-filled fritter topped with confectionary sugar for dessert, although MAPS assured us their pitta tis satzis, a grilled pitta layered with honey and sugar that was unavailable that day, is [insert the sound you associate with your mind being blown into a thousand pieces.] All washed down with a few Coke Zeros, gallons of water, a few bottles of Carlsberg and KEO, and Cypriot coffee. Final tally: twenty-four dishes, 22.50 Euros per round booty and one of the best tavern experiences I've had on The Rock.

So, friendly suggestion. Next time you get your car serviced, chat up your mechanic and give him a heartfelt hug; he might tip you off to some hidden, delicious eats. #HugYourMechanic.

Whine On The Rocks' Rating: 4.5 out of 5 Sparkling Spatulas

Don't You Dare Pass It Up!

For the starving artist, memorable eight-course meals are one in a million. Particularly when a couple of classic desserts are transformed into a dramatically-presented, decadent entree that walks the line between sweet and savoury like a crazed yet deft funambulist. Need photographic proof?

Foie Gras: Red Velvet/Duck Prosciutto/Nori/Chicken Skin

This was course #5 at The Pass, Houston's second-best restaurant and one of America's best new restaurants in 2013 according to Bon Appétit magazine. Imagine a fennel-packed, spicy red velvet cake filled with creamy foie gras and a mille-feuille of crunchy nori layered with crispy chicken skin, duck prosciutto and more foie gras matched with the 2010 Peregrine Central Otago (NZ) Pinot Noir. Boom goes the liver.

The (actual) Pass

Named after the section in a restaurant's kitchen where dishes are given their final touches and sent off to the revellers, The Pass, according to my brother Octavio (formerly known as Shawarma Leg Lover), is the closest the city has to a Michelin-starred eatery. Chefs Terrence Galivan and Seth Siegel Gardner, the latter "a hunk" according to The Wife, Ph.D., and Octavieta, Octavio's longtime girlfriend, have created a mecca for Texan gourmands with inventive, impeccably-presented food, an impressive wine and cocktail menu to match each dish, and a refined yet easygoing ambiance. And the bathroom, which is shared with its more casual sister restaurant Provisions, plays Julia Child reading out her recipes in that arresting nasal voice instead of the usual tunes. 

On our night there, The Pass stumbled out of the gate. The sommelier spilled Octavieta's Malbec and failed to change the dirtied glass and white tablecloth. Ten minutes passed before we flagged down a waiter to make things right. To open the meal, their take on Oysters Rockefeller in the trio of Oysters: Po Boy/Raw/Rockefeller was too doughy and drowned out most of its freshness and brininess. The former two, while good, did not foretell the inspired levels of creativity, beauty and lusciousness that would follow.

Hamachi: Bone Marrow Agadashi/Cucumber

Then, things picked up. Despite its phallic disturbing shape, the Mushroom Bread, complemented with whipped ricotta, wild mushrooms and a healthy serving of shaved black truffles, was soft and earthy and matched perfectly what was undoubtedly the best wine of the night, the 1998 López de Heredia Viña Tondonia Blanco Reserva, a Viura and Malvasia blend from Rioja that enticed you with its aromas of roasted nuts, wild mushrooms, wood and slight oxidation. The Hamachi cebiche was highlighted by a silky, savoury and umami-packed bone marrow agadashi that gave life to the fish's nuanced flavour and delicateness, and the Potato: Raclette/Morcia/Apple, a cheese-filled fritter, was a playful and tasty snack that segued into the evening's heavy hitters.

The Foie Gras I paid tribute to above was followed by Lamb: Citrus/Swiss Chard/Coffee Yoghurt paired with (surprise, surprise) the 2010 Domaine Karydas Xinomavro Naoussa. This was the second best dish of the night; a lamb tenderloin wrapped in lamb neck confit, swiss chard and flaky pastry sitting atop a subtle coffee yoghurt decorated with pickled citrus fruits, sorghum and edible flowers. Fact is, whenever the word "confit" is involved you know you've got a winner.

Lamb: Citrus/Swiss Chard/Coffee Yoghurt

If there's one area where things can be bettered it's dessert. In our opinion, the two dishes (plus the petits fours) fell short when compared to the first six courses. Not that they were bad. But the innovation, combination of flavours and striking presentation of the savoury dishes did not entirely come through. While satisfying, vanilla cake with ice cream and a wine-soaked Asian pear stuffed with Stilton on a graham cracker crumble did not quite stand up to the duck livers, bone marrow broth or The Pass' spin on Beef Wellington.

What else can I say? Don't pass it up. Eat, drink, be merry. Ask for an extra helping of foie gras and close your eyes before you sign the check.

Whine On The Rocks' Rating: 5 out of 5 Sparkling Spatulas

Lunar Calendar? Root Day? Pfft!

Here's a neat video of Nicos Manessis, Greek wine journalist and Regional Chair for Greece of Decanter's World Wine Awards, interviewing Mike Jones, oenologist at Gentilini Winery, and Stuart Graham, a visiting oenology graduate, on the island of Kephalonia's wines. They take a close look at the 2011 Gentilini Robola and 2010 Eclipse Mavrodaphne, discussing the varieties and winemaking process. Things get a bit kooky once Petros Markantonatos, the winery's owner, joins them for a tasting on a "root day," a big no-no for proponents of biodynamic winemaking. They pretty much laugh it off and continue enjoying their red. As it should always be.

An Afternoon with George Kassianos & Chile's Cono Sur Wines

Hard At Work

For those of you who are out of the loop, I have turned to radio-broadcasting in an attempt to jump-start my flailing career as a [fill in the blank]. For about two months now, I have been hosting a show called "On The Panamerican Highway" on MYCYradio dedicated to all-things Latin America. A couple of weeks ago, I had the pleasure of interviewing George Kassianos, chief sommelier for Thanos Hotels in Paphos, on Latin American wine. We also held a live wine tasting of Chile's Cono Sur's range of budget wines. I want to thank George Kassianos for his invaluable knowledge, Photos Photiades Distributors for providing us with the wines, and the dope Cyprus Community Media Center staff and The Wife, Ph.D., for partaking in our raucous tasting. If you're interested, the recordings of the hour-plus-long show can be found below. Fast-forward to minute 7:00 of Part 1 to get started.

Part 1
   
Part 2